HIM: WHAT are you doing?
ME: Making a Birthday cake for young Dr. Korb like I always do on his birthday.
HIM: I want a slice of it.
ME: You can’t It’s for his party.
HIM: I want a slice of it. He shouldn’t be more important than me. (Jealous)
ME: He’s NOT more important than you. But Step AWAY from the cake.
HIM: Look how much energy you’re putting into this. You made blue & yellow and chocolate frosting!
ME: Robert, it’s a drop of food coloring and one second to make different colored frostings.
HIM: (looking at the candles) 32? 32? You’re always going for these young guys.
ME: I’m not always going for anybody. I’m making my friend a birthday cake because his GIRLFRIEND is an MD and has no baking skills, per se, not to mention time.
HIM: I’m sure her skills are fine.
ME: Robert she’s rounding at the hospital Besides I always make Alex a birthday cake. It’s out tradition.
HIM: (takes a knife and cuts off the end of the cake)
ME: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
HIM: And I’m leaving this frosting on my face so he knows I had some of his birthday cake BEFORE him.
ME: What is wrong with you?
HIM: You never make me a birthday cake like this.
ME: I make you a birthday cake EVERY year. And EVERY year you refuse to eat it and buy an expensive cake from some trendy bakery.
HIM: That’s because you’re the cook from hell. When is he coming to get this?
ME: This afternoon, why?
HIM: Because I have to go to work soon, and I want him to see this frosting on my face.
ME: (thinking… “for better or worse, in sickness and in health… this DEFINITELY some of the sickness”)