By Any Other Name…

ME: How do you spell your middle name… is it ay or ey…

HIM: It’s Lindsay, like Lindsay Wagner

ME: Or Lindsay Lohan…

HIM: Why must you be so vicious WILBERT!

ME: My mother only gave me that name because it was my father’s name and she needed a ride home from the hospital.

HIM: Details… It’s STILL your REAL LEGAL name.

ME: legal smegal, I have four or five legal names.

HIM: NO, you have 1 legal name, and 4 illegal names that use interchangeably as legal names because basically you’re a narcissistic sociopath.

ME: That’s redundant, a narcissist is a sociopath.

HIM: And THAT is what you find most disturbing about that statement?

ME: Oh honey when will you learn “the truth only hurts for a minute.”

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