HIM: Hi honey I’m home. WHAT is THIS?
ME: Tomatoes.
HIM: I know WHAT they are… Why are there 4 cases of tomatoes?
ME: Marsha and I went to the produce district on the way back from SC… I got a FABULOUS deal on tomatoes 3 dollars a case. Marsha’s a beast when it comes to negotiating… and she speaks Spanish
HIM: You speak spanish.
ME: Not like Marsha.
HIM: This is NOT good. What are you going to do with all of these tomatoes?
ME: I’m going to make tomato juice, tomato sauce, and pasta sauce for you and Patrick, and I’m going to put it in jars for us to use… cause tomatoes are better for you if they are cooked than if they are raw… more lycopene.
HIM: Look outside… Does this look like Walton Mountain?
ME: No this looks like beauty on a budget. AND Marsha and I are going down to the Docks at 4:00 A.M. to greet the fishing boats to get fresh fish… the deals are phenomenal. Halibut $2 a pound, Swordfish $1.75 a pound, Orange Roughy $1.50 a pound, Catfish 50 cents a pound, Scallops $3 a pound, Jumbo Shrimp $2.50 a pound… Lobster $4.00 a pound.
HIM: Me and my buddies lobster dive…. you don’t need to buy lobster
ME: The only thing you come home with after one of your lobster dives is a head cold.
HIM: I suppose next you’ll want to sell the washer and dryer and take our dirty clothes down to the ocean and beat them on a rock.
ME: You know I don’t do laundry.


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