Life Threatening Situations

Me & My Nurse: cute-asian-straight-male-married)
HIM: I need to readjust your leads.
ME: Okay… (I take the lead and clamp it on my nipple)
HIM: Dr. Gordon!
ME: Sorry, force of habit;.
HIM: So I want to take your temperature.
ME: Let’s do it rectally.
HIM: Okay…. fine…
ME: Wait. You were supposed to be shocked and appalled.
HIM: Hey We don’t have a wine list like Cedars… but we pride ourselves on customer service and satisfaction. (We laugh)
ME: Ha! You got me….
HIM: You like to laugh. Even when you were feeling very bad you still made jokes.
ME: Laughing is easy exercise… and I prefer to save my tears for life threatening situations…
HIM: Oh you mean like when you collapsed on Thursday.
ME: No, like when me and my husband were preparing for an IRS audit and I had to tell him that I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hands and burned up 3 years of tax receipts..

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