ME: What is this?
HIM: The Halloween Candy for the trick-or-treaters
ME: I have these balloons and and whistles I refuse to give sugar to the children.
HIM: Don’t be ridiculous, it’s Halloween. Who wants a whistle?
ME: Lots of kids.
HIM: You’ve lost you mind, and I don’t want to get tee-peed.
ME: Sugar is a drug… and I am NOT handing out drugs to children.
HIM: blah, blah, blah, I’m giving the kids candy NOT balloons and whistles.
ME: Well don’t forget the horns for your costume
HIM: I’m going as Aqua Man… Aqua man doesn’t have horns.
ME: Well you should since what you’re doing is truly evil.
HIM: Yeah well I think you should get naked and let me shove a 2 x 6 up your ass and you can go as a melting fudgesicle.